One Small Act

So this morning I stare at this white screen again with my only thoughts being about me being back in bed under the duvet for an extra couple of moments of sleep. Very little thoughts that could change the world. A quick look at e-mails but found nothing to ignite a fire of creativity. Nothing. Not even a spark. Now that creativity has been brought into focus, my thoughts have drifted to music which is one of hugest passions. I absolutely love listening to music and have a wide range of listening tastes right from classical through to those screaming metal heads. I know many people really love music, but for me, it is such an integral part of me that I really wouldn't be the same person if music couldn't be part of my life. What is that "thing" for you that would change your make-up if it was removed?
Is it photography, surfing, rugby, painting, animals, cooking, shopping,...? What would make your like dramatically less rewarding if you couldn't do it any more?

The next question is, what are you doing to cherish that thing? Do you take it for granted what it is that you are able to do or enjoy? Previously, I wrote about gratitude, so here is an opportunity to practise some gratitude and not take life's passions for granted.

Are you able to use that passion to inspire or serve others? What better way to use a passion than to improve the world for others around yourself. Can your passion for animals help raise awareness in others about the atrocities occurring around the globe? Can your creativity inspire others into another higher emotional state? Can your passion ignite another's passion? Giving them the thought, "I'd like to try and do something like that!"

Can you expand on your passion to make some regular activity more exciting? I listen to music when doing pretty much anything, maybe to stop my thoughts drifting (too far) in the silence of my office or while out on a run. The music just seems to keep me focused on what I need to do rather than allowing random distractions to pull my mind away with the slightest of things. Imagine every activity you are involved in being raised to levels of passion similar to "the thing". Imagine that the thought of hanging washing on the line brought a smile to your face or facing a sink full of dishes before bedtime got you really excited. Silly examples but the point I am making is that we need to find some passion in our daily activities as well as that one "thing". Learn to enjoy those menial tasks. Find something in them that makes you feel good. Something that you can proudly say to yourself that you made a difference there. Maybe it's wiping down the coffee station at the office after a careless colleague spilt his drink and didn't notice (or bother) to clean up. Do it with the thought that the next person will be able to use a clean space. Do it without expecting recognition. Do it knowing that you made a difference there. It is such a trivial example but that is how it starts. Start today by doing something small. It really is no sacrifice at all, but persist in doing something small everyday and it will become a habit. In fact you would start feeling really good about it. In fact it could become your "next thing"!
Now think about everyone adopting that same approach of one small act everyday, people would actually begin to change how they treat and respond to one another and the world could actually be changed. I can't make you change but I can do my small act today and hope someone enjoys the benefit. Will you try and do the same?

Keep the Gratitude

Last weekend, on a pretty miserable weather day, I opted to not hit the mountain bike trails but to rather lie-in a bit. In our house that means something around 7 am. Not wanting to have to endure the internal guilt of not doing my quota of training, I hauled out the indoor trainer and settled in for my morning torture session. Sweat towel in position, water bottle filled and earphones in; hit play on the random playlist and start pedalling. I managed to just close my eyes, got a good pedalling cadence established and seemed to drift away with the music. One particular song came on singing, "I am a miracle," and it just struck me (again) how it is a miracle that I am alive and in fact able to ride a bicycle at all. Five years ago, people weren't saying it but is was in many of their minds that my time had come. At one point I too was ready to give up as well. That was five years ago and I have been able to return to do all the things I was able to do before the accident. "I am a miracle!" I have so much to be thankful for and although I have daily reminders of that event, I often forget, or take for granted, that I am still able-bodied and -minded.

Take stock of what your blessings are and what you should be grateful for. I was reading a book and a chapter was discussing gratitude and how we should make it a daily event to state what we are grateful for. I have tried to implement this with our children at bed-time with moderate success.  This is something, that with practise will become a norm. How awesome would a reflection of the day be, remembering all the positives that happened rather than focusing on those 'black spots'? Hopefully, persevering with this bed-time routine, my children will learn to see, and remember, that they have so much rather than expecting more and more all the time.

No matter the circumstances, there is always something to be grateful for. Some days you may have to search a little harder through the fog but there will be days when you won't be able to stop.
Just keep being grateful.

Are You Entitled?

Once again I have this over-whelming awareness that my emotions are being dominated by anger. There is so much going on in the world again that makes being a human embarrassing. Maybe more so, living in South Africa where so much of what we do or can't do, out of fear for our safety, is based on other people's selfish actions. Vandalism and looting of innocent people's property during protest marches is just beyond my comprehension and raises a level of anger best not put into words. I have no issue with protest marches and fully believe we should be able to stand up for what we believe in but when it turns into a free shopping spree, unlawful damage and just plain disruption for those completely unrelated to the reason for the march, then I have real issues and really obscene thoughts in how to deal with such groups of 'people'.

So that is some of the external sources fuelling my anger-fire. I am also aware of some self-fuelling efforts that seem to go on inside my mind as well. I have written about that voice that speaks to you and how it is you who actually has control of what it is telling you. Reject the negative comments and build on the positive. One thing I have learnt of myself is that I can over-build (if there is such a word) on certain positives to the extent that I believe that I am actually entitled to certain things, purely because I have taught myself to believe it. It goes further than that because when in reality, these things don't line up in the way I know to be the "right" way, then I become angered because of the "injustice".

"Don't they know I am entitled to that?"
"I have worked really hard on this so why don't I get more?"
"Look at that guy, driving in his Ferrari. What did he do to deserve it? He must be a drug-dealer!"

It is embarrassing for me to say but yes, those have been real conversations in my head! In confessing this, I am trusting that I am not the only one, that there are others with similar thoughts.

My sense of entitlement is maybe based on jealousy, times of no or little acknowledgement and also acute awareness of those who gain based on nothing but their network of relations rather than actual merit. Just read the local newspapers about our politicians...

The reality is still the reality and dwelling in these moments of 'injustice' does nothing than to fuel that anger-fire even more. As I have written before, pick up the remote and change the channel your mind is tuned into. Find something better to meditate on. Things that are true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable; anything that is excellent or praiseworthy. And yes that is great advice from  the Bible that is applicable to everyone.

Starting today, when that sense of entitlement is feeling a little strangled by what you are experiencing in reality, pause that moment and just check why you believe you are entitled and you may be shocked to see your rationale is not so pure.
(I am just putting it out there that I will probably always believe that Ferrari drivers have some association with drug-dealing though...)

What Do You See?

Perception has always fascinated me as it is such a personal experience. We can all undergo exactly the same situation but could have completely different perceptions of what it meant to you based on your prior experiences, your thought process or even your mood. As a child I had an extreme idea of personal perception; I would wonder if my reality was the same reality the person next to me was experiencing or if this was a Matrix-type of world for each of us. Perhaps we didn't even share the same world we were experiencing. Of course I loved it when the Matrix movie was released, as it echoed some of these thoughts but did make me question reality all over again...
Having friends who were colour-blind encouraged this thinking. "How could two people see the same thing and perceive it completely differently?". I imagined at times that even our language was spoken and interpreted in completely different ways. In the same way that a tree is still interpreted as a tree to the colour-blind person (even though it may be completely brown), could words be heard or even read completely differently but yet interpreted with the same meaning? That's just my crazy thinking!

One test of perception that has always stuck in my mind though, is of a person holding up a piece of paper with a small black dot on the page and asking the audience what they see. The reply is always, "A black dot." That is how our thought patterns have been trained, to identify what is seemingly out of place or is more prominent. What about the rest of the piece of paper? Was it not also held up and in clear view for the audience? It is never identified. Always just the black dot!

Has our perception filter been developed into something that focuses us onto the blemishes rather than the overall good that is there in front of us?

I wonder if the same could be asked of how I (we) have been perceiving the world lately? A few very disappointing experiences with people has resulted in my focus being on those situations and the way it has affected me. I have overlooked the many, many, many... many great people and experiences I have had with them. I have distanced myself from the world and limited my interactions to be purely 'functional'. My defence mechanism in hyper-drive you might say. I can state with absolute certainty that staring at the black dot on the piece of paper does not bring any enjoyment. In fact it doing so reminds yourself and re-emphasizes that the clean sheet of paper has been 'ruined'. The voice in my head constantly saying, "No going back, it is ruined!". And the rest of the clean sheet of paper is just waiting to be put to good use and appreciated...

Time to change my focus off the black dot and live on all of the rest that this great world has to offer.