Communication

So, I am one of those introspective types who will replay life events over and over in the movie theatre of my mind. Stop. Pause rewind, "How should I have handled that differently?", "What was really meant by that phrase?", "Did I interpret that correctly or does it really mean...?" Rewind, play it again.

It is hard work and is sometimes the reason I don't get the rest I should, hence I am awake at 3 a.m. on Friday morning with an over-active brain again. This time the issue revolves around communication and more precisely, the lack thereof leaving people to draw their own conclusions. A pretty risky and volatile situation especially when people's emotions are involved. Anyway, it has been pretty much all wrapped up and the "lack of an issue" resolved but this event has hi-lited to me (again) the importance of clear communication. 

What may be clear in my mind, is likely not fully comprehended by someone else until I explain completely what the intent is. 

A good test if the correct message has been properly received is to talk about it and get the listener's understanding of the message to see if it was just heard, or if they actually listened.

Being a stereotype engineer, talking is not one of my strong suits so I seem to fail in this communication domain quite often when it comes to life's soft issues. Generally for me, talking is a functional activity and not recreational, so I am quite succinct in delivering my message and usually get the request or information transfer done quite efficiently. Small talk is not for me! 
However, for some reason the emotional type issues are parked in my brain and communicated sparingly and almost always in a spy-interrogation style conversation. 

One would think that someone with a bit of intelligence would learn the value of not doing this over and over again and actually relinquish the burden of carrying these "non-issues". I guess character make-up is pretty difficult to change. I say difficult, not impossible. I believe I can improve on this area in my life and hopefully get my mind some rest. I know, I am not the only one who functions in this manner, and hope those who can relate, or those who interact with similar people, can be encouraged to also change and improve in this aspect. 

"That which we are capable of feeling, we are capable of saying." - Cervantes

"Communication leads to community, that is, to understanding, intimacy and mutual valuing." - Rollo May