Who Are You Listening To?

How do you know when you are performing well? When you are doing your best and putting your all into something?

What voices are you expecting, wanting to hear?

• Someone in authority, acknowledging a job well done?
• Someone you love, who should be noticing your efforts and not taking your input for granted?
• A friend who appreciates your kind gesture?
• A peer, commending you on an achievement?

How about your own voice, giving yourself some overdue praise? This may sound a little strange, but sometimes we take ourselves for granted, always expecting some external recognition. It’s Friday, so stop and review what you have accomplished this week. You will have weeks where, just making it to Friday is a victory! Other weeks you may have a number of snapshots to reflect on and say well done to yourself. Make an effort every week to find at least one gem to hold up and celebrate. Too often the voice in our head is suggesting negative and unproductive thoughts that have no value other than to break us down. I know I can get into a downward spiral where that  thought seems like all I can focus on, with respite. Only when you reach absolute desperation, can you break free and begin to resurface. What I (we) should do, is as soon as you recognise that voice, stop it in its tracks and find that gem again. Remind yourself you are better and capable of better than what the voice is suggesting.
Take this a step further and be a positive voice in acknowledging someone else’s job done well. Tell your loved ones you are grateful for all they do; the important things as well as the silly and small things. Be a positive encourager. That could just be your gem for the week…
If someone else was providing the negative voice, take account of what was said, identify if there is anything you can learn from the comment and make an effort to better yourself with that lesson. Delete everything else pertaining to the message. If it had no value then dismiss it completely. Don’t hold onto it and reply it in your mind. Words can only harm you if you allow them. So, you decide what to accept into your thoughts and what you allow to camp in the dark recesses of the mind.

The more you practise this, the less the negativity will have a role to play in your life. Just as negativity breeds negativity, so positivity breeds positivity.