Are Your Words Being Used to Build or Break?

Closing my eyes this morning and just letting words flash onto the windscreen of my mind, I generated the following list:

Colours, sounds, quietness, waterfalls, open fields, crashing waves, technology, love, sex, busyness, creativity, creation, death, endings, beginnings, fresh starts, connections, friendships, conversation, health, beliefs, faith, hope, prayer, conflict, hate, specifics, randomness, direction.

They seem pretty random, yet have a thread of connection or development or progression from one to the next. What I also found, was that as I read each word, I experienced a certain emotion. Each unique, based on the imagery or memory generated with the association of that word. 
How powerful our words can be! If, seemingly random words can change emotions or state of mind, then how much more powerful can a carefully constructed paragraph or a comment in a conversation be? Are your words being used to build or break? Sometimes it's also not the words themselves, but rather the tone or manner in which they are delivered that can deliver a message. A simple message like, "It's time to go", can be delivered as informative, instructional, suggestive or a multitude of other ways just depending on the tone of delivery. Your physical manner of delivery also conveys a message, so bouncing into a room with a smile of your face contrasts someone with hunched shoulders and a downcast demeanor delivering that same message. 

Absence of words can convey a message in itself. Possibly lack of interest, withdrawl from the process, either as a sign of rebelling or disapproval, or perhaps a lack of self-confidence in the subject.

Ultimately we get to choose our words and the manner in which we present them. Everyday, we also get to observe and interpret messages presented to ourselves. I urge you to think carefully about your words and the manner of conveyance, as the power and effect can have a significant impact. Remember, as you occasionally allow your words to poison, so too do other people make mistakes and you may be on the receiving end of a poorly thought out message. Beware of the people who consistently convey destructive messages and be even more aware if you are one of those people.
Choose to build.

"Do We Hear and See the Same?"

I had a flashback this week of a thought I had when I was young, "Do we all hear and see the same? The world I see, is it the same world you see? Do you see the colour yellow the same way I do?"
I have accepted that we do see and hear everything the same way, in the pragmatic sense but it's our interpretation of the data that varies from individual to individual. There is some over-lap and common-ground that occurs and these are generally the people we spend time with as they have similar outlooks and belief systems. Those that differ radically, usually end up in conflict. It would be a natural movement then, to avoid the conflict and move to where one is accepted with similar beliefs. With the scale of our global nature of doing life, we are constantly interacting with dissimilar people due to ethnicity, languages, religion, social class, education level and political standing. These are only a few differences I could quickly list, no wonder there is constant fighting. With so many differing viewpoints and the probability of two strong-willed dissimilar individuals interacting being very high, we are guaranteed to run into some conflict. Especially so, when one party wants to impose their beliefs and outlook onto another. Do we then live in separatist states, ignoring what happens next door, do we compromise and find some mutually agreeable solution or do we accept the differences for what they are and love the person despite of these differences? If only it was that simple. You are a vegetarian and I enjoy a good steak. That's pretty easy to accept and move on. Political and religious beliefs can run much deeper than that and compromise usually isn't an option in those categories. Acceptance would be the best solution but such is the way of politics and religion that acceptance is usually short-lived and conflict erupts out of the smallest disagreement. 

As different as we are as individuals, the commonality that brings us into groups is very powerful. The basis of the commonality needs to be questioned by each 'follower' before pledging allegiance to the group. 
Does what I believe in cause harm or does it encourage love for other people? 
That simple question should be the basis for any group being formed. Simplistic, yes! Why does it have to be complicated?

 “Your reality is as you perceive it to be. So it is true, that by altering this perception we can alter our reality.”- William Constantine.

A Bag of Puzzle Pieces

This week I felt that everywhere I turned I faced bad news. Reading the local news, my sniffing and coughing children (and wife) and hearing even worse health updates from friends has not made this a hi-light week for the year. The compounded effect makes me want to run away, escape to a calm quiet place where everything is just right with the world. Even if that were possible, it would only be momentary and the weight of reality and responsibility would break through the stillness of that place. Starting with a small voice but eventually being shouted so loudly in my thoughts that I could no longer ignore them. It would be best to face them head-on. Deal with them, move forward and make the best out the circumstances.

Perhaps I think too much. (I know that I do.) Perhaps I am far too sensitive with other people's problems and my level of empathy is detrimental to my own level of happiness. Perhaps that's why I developed my quirky sense of humour; maybe as a coping mechanism or as a way of 'doing my bit' to bring some laughter and joy to others. Maybe I'm over-thinking it, again.

Within all of this I continue to look for my purpose. What am I meant to be doing? I know it's far more than some humorous photo-shop images I put together for laughs. I know that I learn from every experience, every encounter with others. But what is it that I am supposed to do with all of this input? I don't want to reach my last breath still wondering what it is, but rather if there was something over and above what I had done that I could have done more of. I want to have put in the effort to make a difference, to add value. I don't want to waste a single moment on trivial things. I want to be productive, I want to improve myself, I want to improve my surroundings, I want to make the world a better place! Pretty bold purpose, in anybody's book but I believe we all have a role to play in that purpose. Everybody has a bag of puzzle pieces that need to be used at a specific time to make the whole outcome come together. Different puzzle pieces to contribute to different circumstances. You have them all, you just need to decide to use them at the right time. Not putting your piece down may delay somebody else from putting theirs onto the table with a domino-like stalling effect on others and an overall slowing down of the process. When you realise it is time to put your piece down, do it without delay. Play your part, fulfil your purpose and it may just help someone else fulfil theirs. It may also inspire others to look into their bags of puzzle pieces and see what they actually have. No-one has an empty bag! There is always a puzzle being constructed and although interesting to just watch and see how it comes together, how much more rewarding to contribute a building block to that outcome.  Reach into that bag and use your gifts!

Random Lottery-Style Effort

Looking at a blank "sheet of paper" reminds me of starting a new project. You know you have some ground to cover (or white space to fill in the case of writing a blog) but not sure how you are going to get there. I could fill the space with a whole bunch of random letters: ashhgushdnsboign and see if something of value comes out. There is a story about taking an infinite number of monkeys each with a type-writer and given an infinite amount of time, one would reproduce a classic literary work. My alternative to the random effort of lottery-style keypressing, considering my monkey-time is quite limited, is to put something of value into what I need to do. 

I have previously written about making every moment you have count, being positive and an encourager. None of this can be effectively achieved by random action. There has to be some plan and purpose to drive you forward. I can honestly say, it is not easy to write something, I think, has some value. The random keyboard dance seems like a great idea when facing a blank page, or even shutting down the computer and seizing a few more moments sleep. (Did you see what I did there?) Last week was very much one of those moments, but leading up to this morning's blog, I have had a number of comments that made me realise that there is a purpose and a function for these writings that has driven me to continue. Similarly with your new projects, find the purpose and it will give you the fuel to start, as well as to keep you going through the tough and mundane. Keeping your eyes focused on the end objective will give you means to the end, to coin a phrase. It is "Goal Setting 101", something we all know about but don't exercise enough in our personal lives. All of us have the big-dream type goal that is shrouded in mist and usually accompanied by the sound of harps and a choir... I'm talking about setting some realistic goals and putting in the purposeful effort to achieve them. Do some soul-searching, decide what it is you want to achieve and why. The why is probably the missing key for so many goals being missed or left along the road-side of life. You need the purpose to drive you towards the goal. Write down your goal in as much detail as you can. It may change along the way but you have to start with a clear target. Write done the "why". This must be straight from the heart and not based on what others want of you and for you. You can be motivated by others to a point but only your "why" can fuel you for the entire journey. 
As with any objective you must plan how you will reach your goal (no randomness allowed) and also set a date by when you think you can realistically achieve it. 
Revisit your "why" often, like going to a petrol station for a top up of fuel. For this reason, the "why" must be explicitly written down to remind you of your heart-felt desire for the goal. Re-reading your "why" should get you excited all over again and ignite the fires driving your engine when the toils of life have caused you to stall in your journey.